Van Der Wangwe

Things Wangwe Hates

1. Manchester United - I hate with the heat of all the stars in the milky way. and this hate grows…fast, very fast.

2. Lorry Madawa - I may need another page just to express what I want to say about this one.

3. Citizen TV - I’d rather chew on steel nails or watch water from a bucket evaporate.

4. Dopestchiqa - I hate this stupid man.

5. People who call me homophobic. I’m not afraid of gay people I just don’t like them. So don’t come to me with your bull.

6. Jason Derulo - His voice is the sound of the devil farting.

7. Bloggers who make everything a story. I bumped my knee into the coffee table in the dark…new blogpost..FUCK YOU!

8. Some sex deprived fools on twitter that will stop at nothing to compliment a chic just because she put up her boobs. when was the last time you got some? Log out and find yourself a woman.

9. Facebook chat - there’s always that ONE person that is forever online, always wants to chat with you and never has anything of importance to say. “Sasa, uko?, umelost” Fuck off.

10. Yahoo - well I only have a middle finger to show about this.

11. Twitter group tags - “@omera @odongo @james @dick @cunt @vanderwangwe good morning” well, the next time this happens and you’re responsible, I will slowly take out your teeth using a spoon.

12. Poor grammar - this is annoying in every sense. Some folks have such poor grammar instead of reading their tweets you’d rather stare at the sun with your naked eyes.

13. Cats - if I were God for a day…

14. Herpes - not herpes the disease, no, by herpes I mean soap operas. Until they introduce violence, guns, serial killer and machetes in those stupid Soaps operas, I will forever hate on “herpes”

15. The Bus Preacher - This one will go to hell, yes, I have passed judgment. If they don’t…then life doesn’t end with a happily ever after.

16. Classic FM - I am normally at my angriest in the morning, after being forced through a session of ear rape worse than the sound of Lucy Kibaki’s autotune voiced over a Jason Derulo song.

17 Beverage Slurp - Lord please help me not kill the people who do this. Amen.